Thursday, December 31, 2009

Happy New Year From Me To You

To You:

The clock will spin forward tonight
marking another passage
Humanity hoping for the bright
The future turns present.

You will breathe fresh new Air
with dreams renewed
vows declared
forever.

But 'ere this change occurs
Look back a bit and see
Your smile finding me
caused my heart sweet purrs.

Back and forth we ride
o're the years and decades
whilst we laughed and cried
we enjoy each others visage.

Remember before we knew
each others dreams and wants
While still we could enchant
ourselves with future views?

Champagne, party favors
The dress fits round the waist
Midnight kisses, lovers wishes
Lips meld with all pleasures.

Forward we go now
Backwards do we leave
Our lives upon our daring sleeve
Our future pushing at the prow.

Lauren Weyland December 31, 2009

Sunday, December 27, 2009

The Boy Who Loved Music

The Joy Of Music - Chantal Harvey

Hope you Enjoy This

http://ping.fm/MNeDl ( please watch)
In ONE HOUR 1pm SL is the Machinima event of SL.."The Boy Who Loved Music" http://ping.fm/R5gAi

The Week End Year

To All:

We are now in the season of Merry Between and Happy Next Week. It's the best Holiday week of the year. There are no presents to buy and no resolutions to keep. This year we will have a repeat of the long weekend from work but even better no one takes the last week of December seriously except for traffic cops.

All that we striven for during the past year and have not succeeded at slowly eases like the last drops from the shower head, drip drip drip, after a long shower. Depending on the year the drips are either cold or hot but one thing we know our penchant for hope will flow with the rush of an unrestricted shower head on that first day of deja vu. January 1st.

I have never studied the history of the calendar and wonder, before humans delineated time, whether those (before) were confused by what is now called "Indian Summer" (warm days in mid January) and even further back whence humankind emerged from (they say the Sudan...whomever 'they' is) why there was any concept other then day and night.

If we had not developed the clock how long would we have lived? How late would we have been? How fast would a jog be?

Was there 'weekend' sex back then for those partnered for many years?

When would you make a resolution? How long would it last? But I'm pretty sure it wouldn't be like the one I'm making now "to fit a pair of slacks" so my waist will be like 23 and the rest of me,unfortunately, will remain ancient history.

OK Tickle yourself. You are still alive. Damn, now where did I put that skirt.

Lauren

Saturday, December 26, 2009

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas to all and hopefully you'll have a 'good' night. Meanwhile, Sunday at 1pm is the release of "The Boy Who Loved Music." As soon as I can I will post it here. I am very proud to have contributed to this fine children story.

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

LaureLive at Hobo

Watch live streaming video from secondlifehobo at livestream.com

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

All I Want for Christmas

My dear friend Veronika and hadji Xmas wish

My very dear friend Veronika's Xmas Wish http://ping.fm/qhiXa

Sunday, December 20, 2009

Today, 1PM SL Da Vinci Isle Xmas Party Lauren Weyland Live comedy routine: Also, it's my FirstLife Birthday
http://tinyurl.com/yjtpqvf

Saturday, December 19, 2009

Come here my unscripted show. Only announcement now....hope you can make it http://ping.fm/tN3RR

Thursday, December 17, 2009

SL Lost Tribute

Two dear friends made this video

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Open Mic tonight 4:30pm SLT with Lauren If you missed your giggle this week http://ping.fm/Ub2O6
New Blog - Lauren on Tiger http://ping.fm/EaL0A

Tiger Cheetah Woods

Ok, by now everyone has heard about Tiger Woods and his peccadilloes. I am sure we will see the t-shirt soon with "I've been Tigered" on the front and "Cheetah" on the back. We all know now he is an incredible athlete on and off any field, even his "Field of Dreams."

But here is my take on the subject.

First: Why is it whenever a guy is out with a number of women he's considered by men a "cocks man" and if it's a woman with a number of men, she's a 'slut?"

Second: "Why are all these women having to find themselves compared to 'Elin' and that they are all called 'dogs' in the various publications.

I could go on but it's time to change the tunes of firstworld media slant. Let it be known from this day forward.

First: Tiger Wood's is not our local pastor, the Reverend Billy Grahman, Christ or the latest Disney character. He is an athlete. (side note....rumor has it Arnold Palmer probably still holds the 'green jacket' of escapades by a golfer.)

Second: Women are as sexually active as men (where did you think the 6.5 billion people on the planet came from?)

The news story here is only the loss of current endorsements. (I mean product endorsements not sexual ones. Although the late seem to be increasing.) And, the image is created by the advertising and product company green. You do realize there are people who probably worked on Mickey Mouse who....oh heaven forbid and since I don't know and have no need of a lawsuit....I will not exercise my right to freely be ridiculous. However, if Tiger goes back to golf course and starts winning (see Michael Jordan, etc) this will all fade and instead of selling Buick he'll be selling Ferrari. Instead of Nike, Versace. Instead of Accenture, Victoria Secret.

This is just another episode of the "Young and the Restless." No one knows the real Elin and how she feels. Perhaps Tiger is a cervix killer. But of course until the financial settlement there is still a myth to play.

And, since recorded history there have been 'peccadilloes'. But it was our friend "Bill" (Clinton for those of you who are wondering) who made it 'de rigueur.'

What 'is' is? What 'is' is! What 'is' is.

Pour the rum, get out the red peppers and let's heat up our lives. Remember, at your funeral they never recall your sexual escapades.

Friday, December 11, 2009

Tis Another Season:

The end of another year fast approaches. Have you decided what your SecondLife resolutions will be? Here are mine.

1. I will dust old particles from my SecondLife house before Spring.
2. I will refriend a past defriended.
3. I will visit at least 10 new sites with avatars I have never met.
4. I will sort my inventory by year and season.
Example: Dresses 2007 -Spring:
5. I will think of SL breast enhancement.
6. I will pick up and Linden's I find in the street. (I mean money)
7. I will not curse when I can't log on.
8. I will not hit my computer when graphics don't rez.
9. I will not covet my neighbors computer.
10. I will try to understand when someone crackle talks in SL.
11. I will walk more often and fly less.
12. I will cut my SL experience to less then 24 hours a day.

(more to follow) -- please add your own resolutions in the comment box.

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Tonight OPEN MIC with Lauren 4:30pm SLT. Lauren's Place on Cookie http://ping.fm/jHchL JWheels Presents

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Learning to Grow-Up

Before I get into this blog I would like to leave you a link to my Treet.TV show of Dec. 2nd LAURENLIVE

Now with that said I have opined of late regarding SecondLife and some of my thoughts were wrong (some were right.) There are changes and we will have to explore them or be left behind.

The Metaverse is forming into different worlds and directions.

Example we live (in SL) in an immersion world with many different grids developing (Blue Mars, Rezzables, Heritage, etc) They are all developing and although you can't bring your wardrobe to them perhaps you can think of going there, establishing your name. IBM and SL were able to tp between grids recently. This shows the possibilites. Linden Labs even has a new grid for education (outside of SL).

If you don't know what "Augmented Reality" is I suggest you Google and see another future that is here today. "Layar" is a leader in this field. Check their web page out.

For me, I will be spending sometime visiting all these worlds and seeing how "LaurenLive" will be able to grow a larger audience. I'm sure I will make many mis-steps during this learning curve but hey, if can't afford to fall you shouldn't try walking.

P.S. I guess everyone knew the drop in numbers at SL was due to many factors. The elimination of Bots. The purging of some non-active accounts. And, of course, those examining other worlds or changing lifestyles.

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

sorry http://ping.fm/kYDvq
If you missed the show last night it's here . http://ping.fm/MJNkH
and if you can't get in..watch it live now http://ping.fm/qALVA
Tonight 4:30pm slt Lauren followed by Bart& Whirl mixed together. http://ping.fm/e0djU

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Dec 1 @ 4:15pm SLT - come be on TV with Lauren. Wave to your Mom, smile at your kids. http://ping.fm/KSpQc

Sex With Ducks: the Music Video by Garfunkel and Oates

Ok...these two girls are very funny. NOT SL but still a hoot. So it's my laugh to you till I write a new blog

Monday, November 30, 2009

PLEASE NOTE: The show is Dec 1st TUESDAY at 4:30pm SLT (please come 15 min. early)

Saturday, November 28, 2009

Eden Will Bloom - Music Video

Tamra Sands in SecondLife is one of the wonderful talents of our world. I am honored to call her friend

Monday, November 23, 2009

Emails

Now I guess this doesn't happen to you but it sure blonds' me out. Last week there was an email about embedding Treet.TV video onto your web page. There had been technical problems with the embedding code or something.

So, this email begins with one person explaining 'how to do' and then it happened. The dreaded email reply of novel length. The reply must have been a 1,000 words and I was lost before I got to the period in the second sentence.

This email elicited numerous replies each of technical manual length. I tried to read them but my white space was more in focus. Has that happened to you where you can believe the length of an email so you just read a few adjectives and delete? I'm not talking Spam. No, these are emails you should be concerned about but your brain cells are popping like firecrackers on your front lawn.

Each reply is as if the author is saying, "if you think you are erudite this email should prove you aren't."

And now (I did not create the following line but I do like it) it's like hearing, " Why don't you Twitter My Space, I'll Wave back and then you can Google all over my Facebook."

You can connect all of this together and get Sparkle for your Iphone eventually creating havoc on your reasoning abilities not to say anything about how you can't remember what to get when you're in the Supermarket (if you can even GPS your way there.)

Oh, and while we are on all of this Helter Skelter I noticed the other day there is a pad you can put your chargeable devices on so you don't need a three hundred socket outlet. But, I thought, if they can do that then why can't I just walk into my house and my little electrical friends simply get their personal electric fix from the charged air waves.

Next, each device will start to Twitter each other and we can finally find peace. Emails we can't understand will go to Spam. And finally our Metaverse will be a Betterverse for blonds.

Saturday, November 21, 2009

LaurenLive at Moulin Rouge Nov 21 6pm

Tonight is a big night. I return to the Moulin Rouge and immediately after my show the fabulous dancers will pay a tribute to the Can Can and much more

http://slurl.com/secondlife/Moulin%20Rouge/50/165/28


Saturday from 7-9pm the Moulin Rouge comes alive with a special tribute performance directed by our own Goddess of the stage, Xanthia Lisle. She has outdone herself this time with her incredible set work, costumes and designs. She has brought together for your pleasure three of the timeless acts from the Moulin Rouge Movie. The selections are Lady Marmalade, Sparkling Diamonds (Diamonds are a Girl's Best Friend), El Tango de Roxanne followed by our infamous Cancan Medley.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Open Mic with Lauren 4:30pm SLT Tonight

Tonight OPEN MIC with Lauren 4:30pm SLT. This is at Lauren's Place on Cookie http://slurl.com/secondlife/Cookie/126/247/22 Also tonight, JWheels Presents, the great EvaMoon.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Whinning on Wine

I found the wine article "A Hint of Hype" in the Wall Street Journal Weekend addition so true. Over the years I have enjoyed many fine bottles of wine (fortunately not at the expense of my own wallet very often.) Usually I have reserved my judgment for private reflection rather then make a public outcry to the phoniness of the rating system and even more often the phoniness of those who believe they are the great purveyors of wine truth sitting at the dinner table.

I've learned besides the truly occasional odd vinegars wines take on a wildness of their own. (one of my outbursts was over a rare vintage Petrus I found undrinkable. I think it's the most expensive bottle of wine ever poured down the drain by the chagrined host and I didn't have my blond shield on that time.)

Wine experience malfunctions:
Did you brush your teeth within the last 2 hours?
Do you have a cold?
What was the wine served with?
Did you have a drink prior?
Did she amuse your eyes before the bottle came?
Was the 20 year old Cabernet served at your 20th Anniversary soon to be forgotten party? And on and on.


In fact, from deep within my subjective outpouring cellar of thought, only one wine has ever stood the test of my 40 years of consumption and it's a desert wine. D'Yquem has never let me down as long as it's been aged long enough and I've been just tipsy enough by desert.

(ok, not the typical blog but then again I'm not your typical blond)

Saturday, November 14, 2009

The Cameltoe Song

Video came from this site....oh laugh http://www.cuchini.com/pc/The-Cuchini-Pad-1p1.htm

Moxy Barracuda On Stage In First LIfe

Last night I went to see the play "Outward Bound" by Sutton Vane. Although the play was written 75 years ago it was incredible today. Amazing how well acted it was and the wonderful way it was presented with a simple set that imparted all the feel of being on that ship.

You should know Moxy had a starring role. He was tremendous. The play is 3 Acts with 2 intermissions and I still didn't want it to be over when it was. Moxy listed in his credits performing in SecondLife. He listed his role as Puck in MSND . He also listed his performing as Moxy Barracuda the musician and most of you probably don't know he's not just 'an accomplished musician' but he's also a member of the Intl. Brotherhood of Magicians.

I can only wish all of his SL friends and fans had been there last night to see him perform. The theater was packed with regular theatergoers and they were simply thrilled.

Moxy....to you. My hat's off. Your charm was evident (he played a Reverend) and your joy of the production was felt as well as your fellow actors.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

What's New Is Old: Yesterday Returns

I began to notice changes leading to a new view on the world we call SecondLife and the Metaverse. Perhaps you've noticed many of your friends are on less (I am not talking about those who've left the Metaverse). They are spending time in Blue Mars or at Rezzable Open Grid.

You've heard how Musicians find audiences shrinking and not sure what to do. You've heard the thoughts of SecondLife becoming small regional spheres of influence. You may have noticed NPIRL stopped writing their blog. And, if you haven't you should go read Bettina Tizzy's closing blog http://npirl.blogspot.com/

I think this particular quote from the NPIRL blog is pertinent

"
I like to think Not Possible IRL has raised awareness of quality content, not just in Second Life but in other virtual worlds where User Generated Content is possible."

Now that I'm doing some recording for Treet.TV and after checking the advertising on Vain Magazine (SL mag on both web and in world) I have come to believe the future of performance art (Music, Books, Shows etc) will be a combination of a New Age Television (web based) Channel such as Treet .

This will have a new type of advertising associated with it and will be able to be seen on many different devices. Right now many Treet shows are posted to ITune Podcast but I see the return of the old Network Broadcast Stations. Treet will be able to cross metaverse platforms and shows like "Tonight Live", "First Question" and others will be (an old word) broadcast live to these other platforms.

In some ways, we can think of the various metaworlds as being other cities, towns, etc. In their earliest formation they will have their regional broadcast but eventually they will be networked. This network will be so cross platform we will one day see Treet.TV on your regular TV with it's own channel. (hey, I say Treet because that's where my show is).

There will be a live show in one Metaverse and watched by many who don't even visit that Metaverse and some who don't log on to any world but do use the Net. We will need smart, fun ads that are short. Show formats may include an hour long episode but also perhaps a simple musician's 15 minute Live show. Look at television (shows on architecture, underwater SL adventures) and any creative content keeping viewers coming back and staying longer.

We will have creators and in world viewers but we will also have completely passive 'organic couch potatoes."

Treet will need to not only produce good programming but also plan to keep the audience from one show to the next. At some point the producers will comment before their show is over what's coming up next.

Yes, at some point "What's New is Old." And we will be watching "Yesterday Returns."

Monday, November 9, 2009

My Favorite

I just love this commecial and the whole song is download Amazon for free

Monday, November 2, 2009

Phaylen LIVE - December 13th 2009

Absolutely a must watch. Phaylen rocks

Sunday, November 1, 2009

The Great Hair Story

Treet.TV posted the video of my hair raising story http://archives.treet.tv/lauren-live-wax-kit

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Something's Up

The times they are a changin'. The crowds in SL seem to be dwindling. A few top performers are still making a draw especially newer performers who are exceptional. I wonder if the audience has a 1/2 life in SL.

In Firstlife you have the possibility of a geometric increase in recognition and audience participation. Over the past month I have visited many regular shows and spoken withlong time performers both noticing the decrease in audience and confirming such with the performers I've talked with.

What's up here?

Subjectively, I believe it's a combination of factors and I think only a few solutions can be effected although there are other critical elements which could be quite favorable but I feel will never be implemented.

As you know from a previous blog I discussed what the performers could do to increase their audience so I will, instead, focus on other areas

Problem: We are losing many venues in SL and their audience dispersing in SL or simply leaving SL.
Solutions: LindenLabs needs to take an active role in these solutions since the residents can do nothing on their own.
1. There needs to be two types of EVENT listings. The current one (which could be vastly improved and the Lindens have been quite aware of this but have done nothing.) Another would be to highlight Venues based on several different statistics. Popularity of the Venue. The amount of time the Venue dedicates to performance. A better category set up. Also, Venues should be able to pay for size of font and bold, italics, color or whatever makes sense to stand out in the Event listing. Here we are with a still boring Event listing service that excludes much and erroneous categorization.
2. When logging on we could use something better then the one line click to a single show (BurningLife etc.) Instead have a box with 5 upcoming shows in the next hour of note and the ability to click directly to events from there.
3. Hippo Group and similar non SL group managers fail to give crucial data. Example: there needs to be information regarding each fan member's last log-in and the ability to delete those not in world for a period of time by setting that amount of time.

Whether Linden Labs understands the value of anything besides education is questionable. Their inability to create digital copyright for creators and their disregard of the entire entertainment industry (except for SLCC lip service) is very destructive. There needs to be a dedicated group at LindenLabs who understand how to cohesively bring various fractions together for similar desires. There are many ways to do this in a digital push/pull social world. I just wish they would find one of them.

Lauren

Saturday, October 24, 2009

LaurenLive Today Oct 24th 11am

Today Saturday Oct 24th at 11am LaurenLive a benefit for Breast Cancer Research http://slurl.com/secondlife/Bella%20Vida/127/125/26

Thursday, October 22, 2009

StepUP! PSA

Ok, this is a pretty kewl video. See if you can name the people in it

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Bandwidth: the New Obesity

This will be brief. AT&T, Time Warner and other bandwidth providers are testing bandwidth plans coupled with monthly total usage.

Example AT&T is offering there top service of 18meg with 150 gig cap per month for $65...and down you go. No more unlimited bandwidth.

So, does anyone know how many gigs per hour we use on SL? Or, how much with Twitter, Facebook and everything else?

Are we about to be stifled? Because if so, I say broadband should be nationalized. In Finland it is now a 'right.' But the country that offers the most bandwidth with unlimited usage will have a better chance to be in the forefront of many global achievements. And limiting the amount will be another way to close a possible door to prosperity for the underprivileged.

I would love to know how this effects us in SL?

Thank You and Curtsy

I want to thank all those who've come to my shows and supported me over these years. Last night's show which was recorded for Treet.TV was one of my favorite performances. (hey, I liked it) And although there were many regulars (Lailu, Crap, Thinkerer just to name a few) and some who come from time to time (Doran, Fur and others) amazingly there were a vast number of new souls and friends who came for the evening. Forty-Five wonderful avies attended and most stayed for the remarkable Tamra Sands concert after. (there are lots of names I didn't mention here. It was a space thing. The space between my ears.)

Hopefully, those of you who read my blog, will forgive me the lapse between them lately and also my advertising my shows here. I've been advertising my shows here, facebook and twitter (besides my group) since the marketing people from McKinsey & Co suggested I could boost my ratings and perhaps make enough pin money to put Lula through college someday. There are so many good colleges in SecondLife to choose from too.

For those of you who haven't done this yet I suggest you look into downloading the Emerald Viewer (don't forget to download the Voice Patch too) and follow all the instructions for installation. The viewer rocks.

If you haven't seen Crap Mariner's blog you should and if you can find her current flickr account I suggest you do. You may also want to check out Ana's Blog for a few selections she's made (and awards.)

Next two shows. Oct 23rd at 5pm and Oct 24th 11am. See you then Lauren


Tuesday, October 20, 2009

LaurenLive and Treet TV Oct 20th at 4:30pm SLT

Come on down and have a laugh with me tonight. Tonight will be a new format and lots of new laughs. If you have your Emerald Viewer and have bounce turned on you will see a new and wonderful boobie show. http://slurl.com/secondlife/Ivy%20Falls/27/11/503 After JWheels presents the lovely singer and guitarist Tamra Sands. So come have fun

Saturday, October 17, 2009

LaurenLive at Burning Life

I'll be at BurningLife today, Oct 17 5pm SLT. Here's the slurl http://slurl.com/secondlife/Burning%20Life-Trego/6/9/24

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

More Lauren On Love

Dear Lauren:
I have a serious problem and wonder if you could help me. I am new in SL and just got a penis but I don’t know how to position it. Can you come lend me a hand? Nervous

Dear Nervous:
If I lend you a hand you will turn from nervous to fearful
----------------------------
Dear Lauren:
I think my master is cheating on me. What should I do? Concerned

Dear Concerned:
Tighten your collar.

------------------------------
Dear Lauren:
I am so in love. My girlfriend and I want to partner but I don’t have 10L. Can you Help? Helpless in Seattle

Dear Helpless in Seattle:
First off you need 35L since departnering is 25L which will come at you fast.
--------------------------------
Dear Lauren:
My inventory is a total nightmare. I have 47,000 items. What can I do? Cluttered

Dear Cluttered:
Do what I do. Throw everything out but your shoes. You’ll feel much better and like me you’ll probably get down to 10,000 items

More to come

Monday, October 5, 2009

Just to Funny

So, I'm out shopping for vaginas. Yes, you always have to see what's happening in the vagina department. Anyhow, I'm at a sim where they are selling the latest 3D vagina. (Thank god since a 2D vagina would be a bitch to penetrate.)

Anyhow, the sign says, "Five States of Arousal," and all I could think...California, New York, Nevada, Florida and couldn't figure out the 5th when this couple comes in and they are both talking SL stupid. I'm standing there hoping they don't ask me to their wedding and then they're cooing each other about all this vagina offers.

My mind began to twist and I noticed the sign said you could copy and modify the vagina (no transfer fortunately). Suddenly I couldn't help myself. I blurted out in chat, "You know you could always make a copy and attach a couple of them to your body."

Hearing myself say that I suddenly wondered if I would be turned in for Abuse..but no..the good lad turned to his dear and said, "Oh sweetie could you mod one to fit your mouth." It was at this moment I knew they were in love and SL would forever be a place for lonely hearts and multiple pussies.

Of course, how could I help myself. I was encouraged to believe I could make this relationship even more special so I reminded the gent he could rez a penis on his mouth and they could truly be in welded bliss forever.

Guess I need another sedative. See you all soon. BTW LaurenLive and Treet TV will now be on October 20th (Tues) at 5:00pm SLT maybe...and not sure next month...will try to let you all know.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Rambling Rose

Before I get into this blog I'd like to let you all know there's a new Treet.TV segment of LaurenLive (click the link). If you want, you can go to my web page and follow the Link

Chantal Harvey was interviewed on "Tonight Live" Sunday. She does Machinima. During the show she mentioned how she works in regular TV which Chantal calls 2D and prefers Machinima which is 3D.

This simple comment was a terse explaining why so many of us have turned off our TV's. Like radio after television or perhaps even more revolutionary our 3D world will supplant 2D TV anchors, sets and even some of the stories.

There is a problem as the printed newspaper fades. Television hardly ever finds or has time to delve or uncover the stories newspaper reporters have. Since we've gone to a free (Google, Wikipedia) sourcing much of our information is slowly becoming more corrupt. Yes, reporters often made mistakes reporting but since their information was centralized and if the corporation they worked for was respected errors would often be uncovered.

Which has more possibility to be accurate. The New York Times or BillieBob's Blog?

I receive dozens of emails with false information sent by friends. Yes, you can check many of them out at snopes or urban myths. However, many people aren't and we are slowly slipping into an age where someone will say 'the earth is flat' and a majority will take up the carrion cry. Truth can be drowned out.

In a way, this goes for SecondLife as well. When I hear something negative about someone or an organization I don't just accept it. Not even from close friends. If it's a positive then I do accept it without research.

So, before you forward a negative email check it out. Otherwise you will quickly build a reputation for false information.

Chantal, why did you get me thinking on this?


Thursday, September 24, 2009

Tuesday, I flew up to see my father (firstlife). He's 95 years old, lying in a hospital bed with tubes going in and out everywhere. He still has a strong grip and can hold a conversation but the body is disintegrating.

Many of you were with me by your words and kindness these past few weeks as this firstlife truth unfolds. Thank you.

While I stood there holding his hand I felt his life force so much stronger then his body and knew a life force cannot be extinguished.

During the flight (plane ride!) I was reading Dan Brown's new book "The Lost Symbol." Yes, it is junk reading and Brown uses the same style he developed in his first novel "Angels and Demons" but it is a fun read.

What do his novel, my dad's life force and SecondLife have in common. The Noetic Sciences. This central theme in "The Lost Symbol", is also my dad's life force and the energy of all of us in SecondLife.

Eternity does exist. It's where there is 'no measure' of time. No clocks, no watches, no hour glasses. And, without being to spiritual (or else I'll have to poke myself) we are discovering the Noetic Sciences here in SL.

Monday, September 21, 2009

Tooting My Horn

Well, the first segment of LaurenLive & Treet.tv is now posted

http://archives.treet.tv/

I'd love your critique. Already there are several things both Starr and I talked about to make the show do even better. Here are some. Add yours.

1. Cluster the jokes around a 7 to 10 minutes segment. (So Dashboard would be all about that and not jump around like it does on this one.)
2. When an audience member calls out repeat the question so the tv audience hears it.
3. Get the audience to participate from the outset with laughs, claps, boos etc.
4. Lauren needs to be a bit more professional with delivery (think Domino Pizza)
5. Get a better comedian.

All in all it's a start. But this is our show (you and me) so any input would be great. Also, if anyone would like to get involved in the production please contact me.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Rezzin Bran

I slowly rezzed this morning and the world was gray. Particles were dripping from the sky and Windlight didn't enhance a thing. In the bathroom I clicked on the light switch and a pie chart came up with "go into appearance" in bold letters.

The animation in my shower was superb but the hairbrush animation left a lot to be desired. Upon entering my closet I noticed there were some things needing to be deleted from my inventory...pie chart DELETE -- they fell off their hangers onto the floor sitting like a pile of old prim waiting to be cleared from the trash later.

Pulled up my jeans and started to walk out of my closet looking like a Coco commerical with my belt hanging down, zipper undone, underwear showing. Should I go out like this? Would they understand? No, zip, zip, snap, tug, hook. READY.

Tp's weren't working (as usual in firstlife) so I took alternate transportation. I had left my car rezzed the night before so I didn't need to worry about that. The script was pretty good and I liked the radio auto tuned from sim to sim.

Riding the elevator up to my office I looked at the detail and textures and thought what a great builder this elevator person must be. And the script wasn't jerky.

At last, at my desk, sit poses working I wondered how many Linden was my day job really worth.

And so another day in firstlife unfolds.


Monday, September 14, 2009

What's A Mother To Do

Has this ever happened to you? Either you or someone you have given powers goes to 'About Land: Objects" and clicks return all by accident? Well, my sister did that this past weekend. I didn't get upset but I certainly was shocked since I was standing there as all these things disappeared and my inventory filled up like a Gucci bag on a weekend trip.

I called 911 (SL Concierge services) and learned you cannot 'go back' and reset the sim. If they aren't in your Lost and Found and especially, if they are no transfer and set to group they are gone for good. What also amazed me is about 80% of the stuff was returned. Never figured out why the other stuff stayed rezzed. One house rezzed together was half returned.

Then I learned these building block icons in my Lost and Found were actually crap grouped together for absolutely no reason at all. Example, a box of sex attachments ended up rezzing with my boxed Nun's habit. Oh well.

The hard part for me was wondering where my daughter Lula was. She wasn't in my Lost and Found and I was afraid she had been kidnapped so I put her picture on all the milk cartons of SecondLife. Fortunately for me an old SL chicken farmer sent me to a local sandbox. I found out she had been there playing with some boy named Steve. There were thousands of lost and deleted children at this sandbox. Sand Linden said if she's been gone more then 24 hours I should go to the SL Orphanage.

It had been nearly 36 hours so I proceeded to the Orphanage. Low and behold she was there.

For more about this story please come to my show this Saturday at 6pm SLT. Oh, it's being held in a french sim. Interesting because it's like 3am there at my show time. Must be the Galois smokers and cognac crowd who asked for a show at that time.

Again, thanks to all of you. Without your support Lula would either starve or have to go back to the Orphanage. (They looked at me funny at the Orphange. As if I was an unfit mother.)

Friday, September 11, 2009

Short Thought

Most of you who read this blog are highly creative....may I suggest to a few of you to think of entering the Doritos ad contest ($5million US prize). You could use SL and whatever you think would work.

Like, a great spot in SL with an open bag of Doritos. Some chips strewn about. Lauren in just panties saying, "Gosh Doritos are such a big thrill"

Anyhow here's the story. You can Google the site.

Snack giant Frito-Lay Thursday will unveil plans to ramp up from two to three the number of consumer-created Doritos commercials it will air in the Super Bowl. It also will raise the potential booty for its latest Crash the Super Bowl contest from last year's $1 million to $5 million.
The online promotion urges folks to create 30-second spots for Doritos and post them for online voting to be picked to air in one of the three Super

Monday, September 7, 2009

Sharing Something Unique

ok NPIRL and Bettina Tizzy have again created... a must go read http://npirl.blogspot.com/2009/09/giving-new-hawt-meaning-to-virtual.html and start dancing.

See you tomorrow.....Sept 8th

Friday, September 4, 2009

I'm Too Busy To Date Your Avatar!

a must laugh...

Have You Noticed?

This is my Third year in SecondLife and I've noticed many changes. I'm not just talking Linden changes, I am also talking the changes of the residents of our world. There is a developing world of anti-social behavior.

I remember when we got a notice we'd read it and decide to attend or not. Or if someone sent us something in world we'd accept it. Now, we've all learned how to click DECLINE or DISCARD. We've gotten so good we can click through all the Notices, IM's, gifts, invitations before our first 12 seconds in world. We don't even look at the heading anymore.

Many people are shutting off all notices. Deleting all friends. Declining all groups. Some people don't even leave the 16 meters where they log into SecondLife. Builders are building things no one goes to see. Musicians are playing songs for audiences that could fit into a minivan. Comedians have to laugh at their own jokes.

Friends have discarded their old avatar and created a new one so they don't ever have to have friends or groups. It's a rebirth of virgin anti-social behavior. We are now ignoring Facebook. We don't read Tweets. Most think newspapers are something vinyl records are made from.

One of the great benefits of SecondLife, before the new wave of behavior, was the ability to go to a show, be in a voice convo with friends, answer IM's, talk to firstlife children, open mail, pay bills, listen to a YouTube, google a movie, order a pizza on line, all at the same time.

What happened to our multi-tasking. What are we doing now? THINKING? sleeping?

Wake up and hear the silence.


Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Self Promotion

Okay, so this is a short blog and it's all self promotion.

Tuesday - September 8th (arrive 4:30pm SLT - Live at 5pm) I will have the first TreetTV show. It will be a LaurenLive but with a minor difference. There will be 4 six to ten minute segments. Just a few seconds between them. Now here's the hard part. Due to location and support I can only invite 25 friends to come.

If you would like to be one of them please let me know.

Love you all....Lauren

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

When You Need A Laugh

Giving Up Wine

I was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless woman who asked me for a couple of dollars for dinner.

I took out my wallet, got out ten dollars and asked, 'If I give you this money, will you buy wine with it instead of dinner?'

'No, I had to stop drinking years ago', the homeless woman told me.

'Will you use it to go shopping instead of buying food?' I asked.

'No, I don't waste time shopping,' the homeless woman said. 'I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive.'

'Will you spend this on a beauty salon instead of food?' I asked.

'Are you NUTS!' replied the homeless woman. I haven' t had my hair done in 20 years!'

'Well, I said, 'I'm not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm going to take you out for dinner with my husband and me tonight.'

The homeless Woman was shocked. 'Won't your husband be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting.'

I said, 'That's okay. It's important for him to see what a woman looks like after she has given up shopping, hair appointments, and wine.'

(I just had to blog this.....way to funny not to)

A Simple Question

This is such a simple request. Since you are reading this blog I'd love to know your two favorite other blogs and why.

By sharing, perhaps I (and others) will find a great blog we are missing.

Oh, if possible a short descriptive line would be additionally wonderful

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Increasing Your SecondLife Audience

I've had several questions from friends asking why is LaurenLive pulling 45 to 60 in audiences during the summer so I decided to list here some of what I'm developing with the help of my manager Reggier Rimbaud and some I've used over time.

The most important distinction I've made is I don't think of those who come to my show as 'fans'. They are 'patrons' and without them I wouldn't have a show. Also, I limit the number of shows I do since comedy is not that good repeated and writing an hour show is very time consuming. (I think this 'limited edition' of shows is helpful for drawing a larger number oo my audience.)

1. Besides thanking those who donate to your show go to SecondLife Transactions and make a list of those who have and follow up with a thank you after the show (within the next 2 days). Some things I have not done is to keep a list and then merge them so you see which patrons tend to contribute and how often. Also, if they have not joined your hippo group (see below) in your thank you ask (and explain) if they'd like to.

2. Thank everyone who comes to a show (put out a visitor counter). If possible coordinate with your hippo list. I've had patrons come for the first time months after they joined our hippo group.

3. Be careful about overexposure and therefore overwhelming your patron base.

4. Get a web page and make sure your calendar is on it. (see mine; http://laurenweyland.com

5. Change the gift you give. Update your giver.

6. How many patrons have you lost because you asked them to be in your SL Group and then a month later they've left the group.

7. Hippo Group - and there are others besides - allows those who enjoy your show to join a group that doesn't use a SecondLife Group slot. There are several downsides to this but they are outweighed by the upside. The major upside is those who join tend to stay joined. So if they aren't around for a few months and come back they may come to your show. Also, they probably will not leave the group unless you send so many announcements.

8. Get to know the time zone your patrons live in and try to alternate performances to include all. Example 12pm -2pm SLT is good for many in Europe. 3 to 5pm can be good for a good part of the Western Hemispher and Europe. 7pm SLT is good for the West Coast.

9. Most people come to a show because they are in world. Unlike firstlife they don't have a date/time/ticket in their calendar. The most effective time to reach your audience is 15 minutes before showtime. So be prepared to send out notices during the last 15 mintues pre-show.

10. update your profile page with pertinent information

11. And if your audience dwindles don't be disappointed but instead focus on a way to rebuild.

Oops....must go...I'm late for my 'mud' bath. Thank god no one ever came up with a 'poop bath' for skin rejuvenation.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

SecondLife SLCC Redux

What a fabulous time. Oh yes, you will here to the contrary and I will give you my reason why the complainers are so so so wrong.

Let's take care of complaint business first. The big complaint was 'disorganized." And, although the complaint is accurate the intensity of the complaint is foolish. Okay, the programs, name tag badges did not arrive until Friday morning (7a.m.) so Thursday's events were posted (in marker) on a board at the reception desk. (not to hard to figure out what to do.)

Another complaint was the Tampa hotel was more convention friendly then the St. Francis. This is a valid comment in that the breakout sessions were easier to find and the hotel lobby larger with more open seating.

The third complaint was regarding the wireless internet speed and the need to charge the room landline ethernet to our hotel room and hope they removed it at checkout (Of course they didn't till I showed them). A bit of a hassle but hey it was all workable.

A very valid complaint is from the Musicians. At the Musicians Ball the techinical (wiring etc) was a complete mess. But the Ball itself was a smashing success.

Enough about the complaints...on with the JOY>>>>>>>

The hotel rooms, the bed linens were incredible. First Class. Lisa, Skylar, Lily and I shared two rooms. Lisa brought enough alcohol to satisfy any Pre AA party. The St. Francis is a grand old lady with a beauty not built today.

I went to several of the break our sessions. They were superb. Attendance could have been better but speakers were well prepared and the presentations were quite enlightening. The sheer number of presentations and the variety of topics dwarfed the 2008 convention. Kudos to all the presenters. You all represented your expertise exceedingly well.

The Big Speech - Philip Linden - Well, you got to love our rock star leader. The girls swooned over him (and some of the guys too.) His speech though (Evolutionary/Revolutionary) was a bit of a rehash from the year before. But his imagination of the future was right on target. Ray Kurzweil is always amazing. I've followed his ideas (speech recognition etc) for nearly two decades.) M Linden showed us his family slide show (photographers...he needs lessons on composition, technique....well everything about before clicking, during clicking and after clicking.)

And this is where the event exploded into BEST EVER. After the Luau (thursday) we all met at a bar/restaurant [Molaskey's Pub so to speak...love you Apple and Nasus for what you do] and an impromptu jam session. Pailey, Cylindrian, EvaMoon, Jule, Rosedrop, etc etc....played as we drank and ate....it was simply 'marvelous.'

Friday was the Odd Ball. I don't have much to say about this since I did a short show and messed it up. I think I held the mic wrong, there was no spotlight (lucky me since Lauren is getting a bit paunchy) and I wasn't very funny. However, there was plenty of Trance music and Tuna Oddfellow did a great show (despite my closing the cab door on his fingers.) The finger smash happened going to dim sum with Bettina Tizzy as our guide. She sat to my left and Crap to my right. Seven others rounded out the lunch table.

Friday night, after the Odd Ball, we all ended up in the Hotel Lobby with a few musicians strumming and several people singing. Everyone either got drunk or high...many both into the wee hours of the morning. I would tell you more but I'll wait till all the pregnancy announcements are made in the next few months.

All of the firstlife avatars attending are just incredible lifeforms. I don't have room to mention them all but I spent time with Bevan, Blaze, Sloan, CallieDel, Lailu, Candi, Skylar, Lisa, Lily, Gia, Jule, Cylindrian, Orchid, JT, Paisley, Buyers, Eshi, Hypatia, Starr, Yxes, EvaMoon, ToryLynn, Misty, Dusty and so many my detox brain can't remember.

Saturday afternoon we attempted to do Lailu's play "I Gave At The Office" in both First and Second Life simultaneously. We did do something but it wasn't as smooth as we had hoped. CallieDel managed to fall off the stage. We only had two Ethernet lines with three of us so Candi volunteered to try to do her part wireless (actually the cord wouldn't reach her seat so I used it.) And CodeWarrior somehow did his technical magic. Through it all (and this was probably the most disastrous of all the events at SLCC, our one and only, Lailu kept her 'can do' smile.

Saturday culminated in the Musicians Ball (which I got to Emcee and therefore gained entrance to the Green Room. You do not want to know what Musicians do in the Green Room but I think it's probably named for the morning after.) Ed Lowell helped me go from a noobie emcee to a somewhat capable one. Skylar gave me the idea that made the show. Let the audience in firstlife speak to the audience in SecondLife.

There are so many wonderful memories. Pinecrest Diner. Lori's Diner. The Hotel. Union Square. Walking around the town......but what made the event SPECTACULAR were all of you who were there and those of you who were there in SeconedLife.

So, the complaints can only come from those who have not yet learned how to 'satisfy' themselves by the joy of companionship. Those who looked to closely at the faults then the beauty of the whole. Oh, I'm sure there are some complaints I haven't heard with value (lost luggage etc). But, I suspect most avatars will look back and say, "I'm so glad I attended SLCC 2009"

P.S. maybe I'll blog more on this


Sunday, August 9, 2009

The Next Two Weeks

Lots going on these next two weeks. Besides performing in two Balls at the SLCC - The Odd Ball and the Musicians Ball - I have been working on my new show which will debut on August 22nd at Hobo Island 5pm SLT

Last night I went and saw Julie/Julia and wondered why we don't we have a cooking show in SL. Where is the Julia Child of SecondLife. There must be a few SL'ers who love to cook and would like to learn how to make dinner in under a minute.

SecondLife Cook Book

1. What are the best chips to buy.
2. Fastest & Most Nutritious Microwave Meal
3. Keyboard forbidden dark liquids and their replacements
4. Meals with the easiest tear open packages.
5. Foods that don't drip
6. If it's CRUNCHY....mic off
7. Clean-Up "Why Compressed Air is a necessity"

Now I must go pack...what to bring to SLCC.

Help me make this blog reach a 1000 readers a day. Use your friends computers to log in. Post notices in your neighborhood. Become a stripper pole dancer with a tat on your ass saying, "Read Lauren's Blog"

Finally, to those of you who will be at SLCC ......see you soon. For those who can't...you're with us no matter where we are.

LoveLauren



Tuesday, August 4, 2009

FirstLife Meets Lauren Weyland

Now this is really funny. I did the famous...."How famous am I on Google?" That's when you use quotation markes around your name to see how many google hits you have. Well, I found I had 8.760 and wondered if they were accurate.And if so what were they. Of course there were those I knew, blogs of friends, Machinima makers, etc. But I couldn't help wondering "Was there another Lauren Weyland?" And if so, "How could I kill the bitch for taking my Google space." Fortunately, I am the only Lauren Weyland on Google.

And so I decided to look deeper into these hits to see what was up.

At hit 170 I found I was now the 'trucker babe." Yes, go to the "Trucker Blog" and there I am
http://www.truckblog.com/trucktube/?q=Weyland

There's the wonderful tribute by an SL'er in his Firstlife Podcast (I know this person)
http://www.blubrry.com/100wordstories/389691/shutterbug/

Somehow I'm on the "Global Oneness Community" God knows I'm neither a member nor do I know who these people are. Perhaps they are the second coming of the Scientologists.

I've found I have made it into 23 languages. 9 of which I have never heard of.

Wired Magazine posted an article in April 2008.

UNjobs (Switzerland) has me listed under "Computer Engineering."

Lauren Hutton and I are side by side on a web page (she needs to exercise more)

I've been discussed at some symposium in Edinburgh (yikes)

Of course numerous blogs one of which warned of 'sexual content"

I am on the "Global Fire Fighters" community.

Although I've never heard of "Soup-Everyone" I'm there too!

And, I'm on Playboy.

But I my favorite (besides being the Truckers babe) is

Maternity Suits for You - Lauren Weyland Live (an early episode is listed there.)


Monday, August 3, 2009

Lauren Weyland Live for Helen Keller Day

Ok I just found this.

Sunday, August 2, 2009

A little News from a Big Girl

To All My Dear Friends - I'd love you to see the pictures Sennaspirit took of me the other day. He is amazing (and he can be hired if you are nice to him) http://www.flickr.com/photos/sennacoronet/3779544391/

Also, I want you all to know I will have an open mic this Wednesday August 5th. Then the next time I'll perform in SL is on AUGUST 22nd at 5pm at Hobo Island. This will be the opening show of the Third Season of LaurenLive.

I will be performing at SLCC on Friday at the Odd Ball and also Emcee Saturday the Musicians Ball. Don't forget...remember, "some mistakes are so much fun they are worth doing again."

Finally,, Reggier Rimbaud is my agent. So please let her know if you want to book me.

Friday, July 31, 2009

Where in The World is Lauren

My blogging has been a bit in the summer doldrums because of the many activities I am currently participating in. I hope you'll all bear with me until "LaurenLive The Third Season" begins on August 22nd.

I will also be reporting from the SLCC where I'll be performing on August 14th at the Odd Ball and Emcee at the Musicians Ball.

The Musician Ball will be in a 1,000 seat auditorium and all of San Francisco is being invited. Hmmm...perhaps this is a gown evening...here's the info (and below the Thursday info too

‘The Musician’s Ball: A Night of Peace, Love & Music’
Directed by Cylindrian Rutabaga and Lyndon Heart
EMCeed by Lauren Weyland

Jazz & Instrumentals:
7pm Paisley Beebe w/Pato Milo
7:30pm EvaMoon Ember
8pm Edward Lowell (possible Dallas Horsefly playing in Ed’s stead)

Folk/Acoustic:
8:30pm Rosedrop Rust
9pm Wendy Curtiss
9:30pm Lonnie Rocket
10pm Capos Calderwood (Alex Whitmore)
10:30pm TallGuy Kidd
11pm Mash Rhode
11:30pm Juel Resistance
12am SheBangs

http://www.slconvention.org/evening-events/the-musicians-ball-a-night-of-peace-love-music/

And, the Thursday night event


THE ODD BALL!

The Future United is proud to present for our Friday evening event …

THE ODD BALL!!!!!

It’s Second Life’s greatest celebrity, greatest love story, and most amazing light show, all in one!

To the streams of three talented DJs including Jamie Ondeko , Nostrum Forder and thomtrance Otoole, Tuna and Shava will be spinning you up higher than the tunes and the comedic talent of the Divine Lauren Weyland!!!!

So, stay tune for all the fun at SLCC. August 13th to August 16th.


Friday, July 24, 2009

I Gave At The Office

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

A Month In SecondLife

I decided to take the month of July off from performing.

(The way guys in SL go through women I think one of them should write a book called, "A Month With Betty." --see "A Month in Provence". It's a book not a sim. Are there still books? Who are those Amazon people anyhow?)

A month off (well 3 weeks so far) and I have gone shopping...and shopping...and shopping and dancing...listening to various singers and shopping..BUT...BUT...What has been the most fun?

One is being a member of NPIRL and reading the blog (just google NPIRL). This month I was thrilled to visit the new installation by Bryn Oh. If you haven't gone.....you really should...(you can find info, lm etc on that blog.)

But the other day I went to visit the new Sin Continent. Yes Mommy, they still have sex in SL but they are moving it to a new fresh continent so the rest of us don't have to get STD (SecondLife Temerity Disease).

I decided to travel by motorcycle. SinWorld is over 200 sims with roads and 'amuse bouche'. A pun of course but you could Google "amuse bush' if you need to.

Governor Linden is the largest Sin sim owner but i found a tiny spot in one sim toward SouthWest corner) where I could rez something...my famous motorcycle. And it was there I convinced Bryn Oh to join me on our exploration.

Sin and the Single girls.,..In order to get to the first road I had to engage flight controls on my cycle and carefully maneuver around the red barrier and a no sim area. (why are there 'red barriers' in adult land?) But get there I did (because if you crash you must start from the same place). I could drive over fields and on roads...all over the continent. With Bryn as my navigator we traveled from the eastern most shores to the west coast. We rode the streeets of the northern cities and sped over the vast plains of prairie grass sims we came across without crashing.

Sims to the left of us, Sims to the right of us. Rode SecondLife's Thelma and Louise.. Sometimes we had to turn to a different heading but in the end we traveled over a 100 sims (maybe 150 or more) without a crash. (Well, we crashed once at the beginning but not after that). Clothing stores crammed with sexy little prim outfits from early 2005 were sprouting up everywhere. Cages, collar and pose balls from yesteryear yearned to be tried.

But the new item that caught my attention (which may well be 'not so new') was the Lotus Pussy 2.0, a real revolutionary pussy. It still had all the good things from 1.0 like peeing, climaxing, creampies. But there was a new HUD where you can attempt to color match your new pussy to your skin. I was sure this item was in need of a proper girl's consumer report so I bought it. (review to come later)

Back to the thrill......on we traveled Lauren & Bryn. Here's an interesting question regarding my travels...after 100 plus sims....I couldn't move so I logged off and logged back on. My motorcycle was still there and I sat on it and it worked. I didn't have to rez a new cycle (therefore I don't consider the circumstance a crash.) Bryn also relogged at one point due to an 'out of world' experience. And so our journey proved something had changed in SL. The "Kessel Run" had been well surpassed (which means some type of scripting had changed Punky Puglist told me) If you are unfamiliar with the "Kessel Run" I suggest you google it as SL. It was taken from Star Wars and applied to an epic event in SL that only Arcadia ever completed (i believe).

Oh, about the new Lotus 2.0 pussy....do you really want to know? Should I write a review from an unwed mother of secondlife's POV?

.



Thursday, July 16, 2009

Moonwalk2


Moonwalk2
Originally uploaded by Mescaline Tammas
This is kewl. I think I'm somewhere in here

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Profiles and other Dark Thoughts!

What is the thought process behind some of the profiles people dream up?

How many times I'll see a profile that says (paraphrasing)

"I am a very nice person please do not contact me or I'll cut your pose balls off."
"I am so happy with my SL partner Prickly Rose." and in the partner box is a different name.
"I am a real person so please............" (are there robo handlers?)
"I don't take IM's so drop me a notecard" (I'd rather drop you from a high building)

Or the Picks page

One woman had 5 different picks. Each was a different male avie who was her 'soul mate'.
One Guy had three picks and they were all the same pick......BLANK!
Others fill in everything about themselves elsewhere and have no pix.

How about those who say their firstlife is very private and then have a link to their firstlife myspace page?

Do we still need the page that has boxes to check.

How about the firstlife page comments.

1. I made you look. (yeah and now I never want to know you)
2. taken in firstlife and secondlife (I wonder, Do people ask for marriage immediately in SL?

There is so much nonsense here to mine and I am doing that. LaurenLive 3rd Season (which will open late August or early September) will bring new meaning to SL Profiles.

Profiles I'd like to see.--- "
My firstlife name is Dexter. I am a serial killer. I am in SecondLife trying to recover. Please send me your firstlife address and phone number."

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Three Places You Should go This Week.

Go see Hypatia written by Skylar Smythe - (You'll really enjoy this)
17th July – 7-8pm
24th July – 7-8pm
25th July – 7-8pm
Also see Bryn Oh work at IBM 3 (also amazing)
"Lady of the Sea" at Rockcliffe (3pm today. I'll be there)

Friday, July 10, 2009

Hypatia of Alexandria Trailer

Trailer for "Hypatia of Alexandria" by Skylar Smythe.

Thursday, July 9, 2009

Trouble in Wonderland

This is just a simple link to a story effecting all of us in SL. Most important, this should be thoroughly reviewed by Linden Labs and a transparent speedy result should ensue.

http://tleinsl.blogspot.com/2009/07/tle-educational-network-current-status.html


BTW, last night's open mic was one of the best on record. Since we have combined open mic with a show after "JWheels Presents" our audience has increased to well over 40 people (in the middle of the summer WOW). A few of the most important avies in show biz, Linden Labs, builders, creators and lunatics showed up.

As you all know LaurenLive Second Season ended last week and the third season is scheduled to open in late August. I will also be starring in Cinderella as the step-mother in September. During July Hypatia (a play by Skylar Smythe) will debut. You can pick up an lm and notecard at Lauren's Place in cookie sim (on back wall by dance floor). Or, contact Skylar Smythe for a schedule.

During my shows I try to recognize as many of the avies as I can and what they are currently working on. So, Wednesday's is a great way for you to tell about what you have coming up. So come, dance, laugh and guys....enjoy your skirtcaming.

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

SecondLife Seasons

These are the times that tries avatar's souls.

Summer (for most Secondlife residents.) takes many of us outside. We breathe the warm air, swim, walk and rejuvenate and our Firstworld friends gobble up more of our time. Many SL'ers question "why am I in a digital world" and that thought coupled with the multitude of Secondlife repelling forces make us who remain wondering, "Should I sort my inventory?"

If you perform you'll notice your July and August patrons are so much less it makes you worry about your own relevance. Putting together a cast and having them show up has increased difficulties and tensions for the producers and directors.

Tossed into these 'summer doldrums," are other movements playing in the background. You may have noticed "The Rezzables" have pulled out of SecondLife. Well, they left a sim, Greenies, as if an explorer discovered the New World ( a world not so far away as the moon but more like the discovery of the Western Hemisphere) and having built an outpost there, of reasonable size, decided to pack everything up and leave. Behind, they left a marker, a used candy wrapper , hoping that would be enough to have future travelers follow them to find their new civilization.

I've been to "Heritage-Key". It is far more rudimentary then SL was 4 years ago. It has crashes, avatar fright and of course blonds cannot be found. But most important, it's a closed world. An island without pretty girls and handsome men. An island without pina coladas. Already their candy wrapper in SecondLife has blown behind a rock and is decomposing.

Rezzables is no different then many other corporate pioneers. The corporate entity is after 'profits'. If the future didn't hold any and the past did, the corporate world would find a way to go back in time. Captive audiences are another desire. But, the most important ingredient in corporate success is an expanding customer base. Customers filling the capability of the corporate entity and then expansion filling a larger baloon.

Now, all the variou Metaverse open grid worlds face the same problems. Lack of quality and lack of customers.. In actuality, these "Open Grid" systems are closed entities when it comes to "content." Oh, someday, perhaps all these grids will connect and a new SecondLife type metaverse will develop similar to what we have today with the sims not under one umbrella. Will it work? I don't have clue but I know it won't yet.

So, as the Twinities, Google Livlies, OpenGridies, Wannabies, Rezzables and others open and try their hand at a closed/open system and a closed society they will either disappear such as Google Lively or perhaps in the case of Rezzables they will simply watch them slowly derez into a lost tribe.

In the end, Avatarity will prevail as Humanity has regardless of the corporate desires of the new Endrun's sprouting up alone today.

Monday, June 29, 2009

15 Minutes of Fame

My fifteen minutes of fame started last week and ends this week. I know, how can a week be fifteen minutes? I respond, "how can someone who makes 20 silkscreens of Campbell Soup that sell for $12 million each know the length of 15 minutes?" (if you understand this logic you are a true SecondLifer.)

The week started off with a wonderful 1st Question where I was running last till nearly the end of the show and then saw my name glisten as the winner. The fun of the show with Pooky, Hydra and an incredible group working behind the scenes made for a glorious evening. But it was a guest who was there (Phaylen) whom I watched and admired last evening (see below)

This past week has included several performances of "I Gave At The Office" with a star studded audience including Chantal Harvey, Pooky Amsterdam, Timeless Prototype and many others including SL friends and family.

Accidental guest on Cybergrrl's Podcast. (my first)

The Helen Keller show was at 10pm SLT (1 am my time) with many Lindens and educational luminaries (of course my friends). Tonight's show on the main stage at SL6B will be the last show of the week long event.

But, last night on Tonight Live with Paisley Beebe was the heart of those 15 minutes. I was on stage for 3 minutes and interviewed for 12. And it was not my show nor interview that brought Andy Warhol out of his graveyard party to tap me on the shoulder and say, "Your 15 minutes of fame is up."

Instead, it was the joy of sharing an hour with such wonderful guests under the moderation of Paisley and the hour of open, off camera fun that ensued. Phaylen and I had been on 1st Question last week but her interview and the next hour of her wit, charm and drug induced somnolent canine sidekick was part of the lighting for my fifteen minutes.

Paisley's questions and giggles made for the stage I was on. And the audience (most stayed an extra hour listening to our prattle) was the makeup. With all of them my fifteen minutes of 'famously fun time,' came.

I also want to thank all those who behind the scenes make these shows happen. AutumnFox, Yxes, Texas, Saxet, (yeah funny..two different girls...are they related), Delinda, Trulie, Glimmer, CodeWarrior, Rekka, Crap (he won't know why he's mentioned here but he is behind a lot. Usually his work), Thinkerer and to many more to list.

So, my Second Season of SecondLife LaurenLive comes to a close after the last show of I' Gave At The Office" Wednesday night ending with my fifteen minutes of joyous tears.

Thanks to all of you (last time I'll be gushy for a long time.)

P.S. if you install the new client Snowglobe remember, you need to shake a snowglobe to make it work.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Lauren On TV

http://archive.treet.tv/node/3171

Ramblings

Last night was a true SecondLife adventure. I logged in going to Sl6 Birthday sims. While there an IM came from my dear friend Skylar. It was her opening night of her great build in sim Dimension. Time 7pm SLT. I was going to be there.

A few moments later, Crap Mariner sends me a notice (from somewhere outside SL. Where is "outside" SL? Are there shoes I've never seen?) He was doing something at 4pm SLT in sim Trion.

I tp'd to another futuristic sim (yikes, the future is all day glow. I guess in the future there are only toxic colors left.) Scarlett LaRoux IM'd me "I saw you a moment ago and then poof you were gone. What are you doing."

So, we got together and caught up on old times. Scarlett was going to perform at Xanthia's build in sim Dimension at 6pm SLT.

My night looked booked (my one night off.) This girl has been way busy in SL. I didn't even have time to try on a new skirt I had seen at Emery. But the best laid plans of a blond usually are usually quite random.

From 4 to 5pm I could not find Crap's show. He didn't show in world and I searched the sim he was to perform in to no avail but I did run into Chantal Harvey in Sim Dimension. (you must find her build. Fly up to the screen and play media). Chantal is one of SL's talented Machinima artists. Lot's of people gathered there talking about all sorts of 'non-blond' stuff.

Shortly before 6pm, I wandered over to hear Scarlett sing. Xanthia's build is elegant. While there, my friend Orchid popped in too. Scarlett began her routine but something happened to her stream. I was cleaning up my SL closet when I got an urgent message from Pooky Amsterdam. Could I come over, right away, to be a guest on the '1st Question'? (a guest had failed the dreaded 'sound test.) Of course I said yes and rushed over. I tp'd so fast my hair was a mess so I quickly put it up in a bun. And, I was happy my garb was a gown and not the stripper wear I had on the other night.

At this point, I had missed Crap's show. Had left Scarlet's show suddenly. And would miss Skylar's too. My evening plans had dissipated like a particle storm in ta SecondLife lag free night.

1st Question - this is for smart people (of which i am not). It didn't look good for me. Very soon everyone had 4 points except me. I had 1 point. (I think it was a pity point.). Along the way I managed to tie for last place with 6 pts and trailed second by 2 and first by 3. And, the last round is the hardest round of them all. Questions which required answers (not the true or false from earlier). And these are hard questions. Like, "After God tossed Adam and Eve out of Eden what did God do with paradise?"

But, the audience was allowed to type in chat and I knew right away to whom I should listen. Three men out there. Mr. Scientist, Mr. Prospero and Mr. Roger's. I knew to hit the buzzer when they spoke (Hey Mr. Roger's would never lead you wrong.)

At 8pm SLT 1st Question closed with me having 13 points. YES...YES...YES...I saw LAUREN WEYLAND flash on the board. I had won. I was so happy I immediately bought a pair of shoes I don't need on Xstreet.

If you haven't been to 1st Question. It's every Tueday night at 7pm SLT. It's a great show with Pooky, Hyrdra and Yxes (and others) making a truly incredible game show.

Finally, tonight is opening night of I GAVE AT THE OFFICE. TP over to sim IVY FALLS. Showtime is 7pm SLT. I'm playing the part of Cecily, the receptionist. Come here me in the 'phone sex' scene. It's orgasmic.

Love Lauren

Friday, June 19, 2009

News: FirstLife funnier then SecondLife

OK, I just created a Google profile. Another new piece of social networking. I can't wait until I'm included in the firstlife global population demographics.

Here's the link http://www.google.com/profiles/Lauren.Weyland

And the best part...check it out. A google map to ME. Oh yes, I exist therefore i want my social security check sent directly to me in Old Wives.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

So You Want to Be an Avatar

This is written for those outside SecondLife looking in and asking us inside if we can help your metamorphosis to 'avatar' and some to 'avatar lux'. So,SL avatars if at the end of this chapter you have something to add to help a firstlifer become a noobie please leave a comment.

Chapter One:

It all begins with creating an account and downloading the client. The great issue here is what will your first name be? If you pick Lauren then your next move will unlikely not be to pick 'male' as gender. Also, you will not be the only Lauren in SL.

Some people will pick a name like my friend "Crap". His full name is Crap Mariner. Now if he ever makes an alt and wants his friends to recognize him as such the odds are there aren't many Crap's in SL.

If you pick the name "Asshole" be prepared both to be perceived as one and then find out there is a family of Asshole avatars. (Many with that first name. Some just are regardless of their name.)

A truly unique first name such as "TwittleBog" will allow you to change genders (yes you can change genders at will). If you are an avatar girl this allows you to skip the dreaded PMS and instead be a man during this period and spend those days as just an IDIOT. (joking).

Be careful chosing the length of your first name. Once you go over 5 letters or numbers you will find you now have a shortened name. So, if you go with "DoICooK" you will find everyone IM's you as DICK. Especially for using capitals in the middle of your name. And, if you go with a very very long name, such as "SimplyHumanInterestingTibetan'. You will be called.......If you hadn't capitalized the H..I...T you'd prob be called Si. However some may call you......

You've got your name and now you are ready. Pick a gender. Male, Female, Other. (oh yes, the Lindens believe in Other. Someday you'll get one of their surveys.)

Now log on:

(Chapter 2 will deal with "Why can't i log on?" And, for men, "Where is my penis?" and for woman "Where is his penis?"

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Drama Comedy

In deference to possible misunderstand I have removed this blog and all comments. I also want everyone to know I had no problem with anyone associated with Perfect World Productions. I have the highest regard for all those who are associated with this show.

Sunday, June 14, 2009

Promises

I promise I'll write a blog in the next day or so. I have much to say but I've also been so busy doing shows in SL. Anyhow, I have my interview with Paisley Beebe at 6pm SLT. And then I'm done until the SL6B show. So, I'll write one.....miss you all.

Friday, June 12, 2009

The Ultimate Singing Bride - starring Lauren Weyland, by Chantal Harvey

You need a drink before you hear this

Another First for Lauren

Ok, none of you are going to believe this but I was asked to endorse a company selling Ugg Boats in FirstLife. I have several pair in SecondLife and love my Uggs.

I love the name of the company making these Uggs -- Whooga
www.whoogaboots.co.uk

Also, if you buy a pair you will get $30 USD gift certificate ($19GBP) just type in LAURENWEYL.

This is the first time I have been asked to put the LaurenWeyland brand on a product. If I showed you the email you'd see how kind and considerate this woman is. She is also just as sweet in SecondLife. So if you ever wanted the best pair of Uggs go take a look at Sarah's site.

You all know I love to support everyone in both lives to succeed. If you'd like me to announce something you are doing please let me know. I am going to try to write once a month a blog on what each of us is working on.

BTW...don't forget to link to laurenweyland.com

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

www.laurenweyland.com

Thanks to Nicky Wise who created my new web page. I will suggest to all who read this blog to bookmark www.laurenweyland.com
for the future since it links to here and many other places I visit (calendar, facebook, twitter, plurk etc)


Love you all. Oh and if you missed the Bridal Show, I will redo parts of in both Saturday and Sunday's show

Monday, June 8, 2009

EXCITEMENT

THIS IS A BIG STEP FOR ME......no I'm not going to change the color of my hair. And, it isn't the show tomorrow night where I'll wear a wedding dress.

Instead....under construction... and with Nicky Wise help, I am taking a step forward. As of today I now have a domain www.laurenweyland.com

It is currently under construction (I made the mess you will see if you go there.) I tried to get LaurenLive but the domain is for sale for over $1,000 dollars. I offered the company Lindens and the just said, "go away girl."

When the site is up there will be links to several things. There will be NO flash and one page.

Hugs,
Lauren

Sunday, June 7, 2009

LIVE - CHICAGO DANCE SHOW @ MOULIN ROUGE! - Chantal Harvey

They put on some incredible shows at Moulin Rouge. Can you find me? Lisa? Orchid? Chantal (and other friends in the audience.

Thursday, June 4, 2009

San Francisco---coming soon

SecondLife Convention 2009 - August 13th - is just around the corner. (BTW there are two other unSL Conventions. One is in Amsterdam and nearly over and the other is in Las Vegas (set by Stroker--think sexgen beds etc) and will be next month.

But....the one I'm going to is in San Fran and I'm making a list. Also, I'm thinking of having a makeover for my avatar. Perhaps a new skin. Prim toes. Hmmm....do I need to bleach everywhere? Which has got me thinking about FirstLife blonds (and SL too).

For some reason FirstLife natural blonds just don't seem to be as good looking as those who have been 'naturally' colored at a salon. Drifting off for a moment, as funny as a salon saying 'natural colors' is when I was in New York this past weekend and noticed all the Dry Cleaners now say "Organic." Oh, Please....you cannot get my Saturday through Sunday dress clean organically. I want my dress to be CSI spotless. An ultraviolet no-show. And you can't do that without a mixture created by Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde will know.

And so, besides my SL breast milk being certified organic by the Lindens what else is 'SL Organic?"

Back to San Fran (hey in the modern SL/FL world schizophrenia is an asset not a liability.) If any of you plan to attend I would like you to please help me make it from the bar at 3am to my room. I want the Tequila but would not like to see the sunrise. (Early morning is mascara madness.)

Of course LaurenLive will present at the Convention and I promise San Francisco is about to loosen up after I'm there. But, as the countdown begins to San Fran my friend Skylar has already started packing, unpacking and packing shoes. If you are still indecisive about coming I understand. You just don't want to see wild unpacked.

Ooops...got to go, I see my attendants approaching.